Why did you choose to read this particular book?

12 Rules For Life was pretty much #1 on the charts for a long time. And with the rise of JP, I had to get a copy.

Summary of book

Most of the rules are pretty straight forward, some are a little cryptic, but all are necessary to apply to your own life.

1. Stand up straight with your shoulders back
2. Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping
3. Make friends with people who want the best for you
4. Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today
5. Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them
6. Set your house in perfect order before you criticize the world
7. Pursue what is meaningful (not what is expedient)
8. Tell the truth – or, at least, don’t lie
9. Assume that the person you are listening to might know something you don’t
10. Be precise in your speech
11. Do not bother children when they are skateboarding
12. Pet a cat when you encounter one on the street

Summary of each rule

Rule 1 – Stand up straight with your shoulders back

Lobsters show how important dominance hierarchies are in nature, something that all complex organisms have adjusted to. Being low in status is not good for most animals because it means they have fewer choices for where to live, fewer chances for good things to happen, less tasty food, less appeal to potential mates, more chances of getting sick, aging faster, and dying earlier, with few people to mourn them. By standing up straight and acting confident, individuals can improve their brain chemistry and have a better life by achieving higher status.

Rule 2 – treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping

People often prioritize their dogs’ well-being by giving them medication, yet they hesitate to do the same for themselves. It is crucial to contemplate our own future and envision how our lives could improve if we took proper care of ourselves. Which profession would push us to grow, allowing us to be both productive and supportive?

Rule 3 – Make friends with people who want the best for you

Before rescuing someone, it is important to understand the reason behind their troubles. Avoid assuming that they are completely innocent victims of unfair circumstances and exploitation. By disregarding their personal responsibility, you take away their ability to take control of their own lives.

Friendship is a mutual agreement, and you are not obligated to support someone who contributes to making the world a worse place. On the contrary, it is better to surround yourself with individuals who strive for improvement rather than worsening things.

Rule 4 – compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today

Hierarchies of achievement nowadays are extremely vertical. It doesn’t matter if you hold the position of Prime Minister in Canada when there is someone else in the United States. Nowadays, you are not only competing with your local community, but also with the top performers from all around the globe in most industries. You have your own unique challenges – financial, personal, and psychological. Focus on running your own race and avoid comparing yourself to others.

 Rule 5 – do not let your children to anything that makes you dislike them

Many parents decide to be friends with their children. They want their children’s friendship above all, and are willing to sacrifice respect to get it – that’s not good. It is an act of responsibility to discipline a child. It is a careful combination of mercy and long term judgement. 

 Rule 6 – Set your house in order before you criticize the world

These days, achievement structures are extremely hierarchical. It doesn’t matter if you hold the position of Prime Minister in Canada when there is someone else in the United States. Nowadays, you are not just competing with individuals in your local community, but also with the top performers from various industries worldwide. You encounter your own unique challenges – financial, personal, and psychological. Focus on your own path and refrain from comparing yourself to others.

Rule 7 – Pursue what is meaningful, not what is expedient

Life is filled with hardships – a fact that cannot be ignored. So, what can we do to tackle it? One option is to seek pleasure, follow our desires, and live in the present moment. We might choose to do whatever is convenient: lie, cheat, steal, deceive, manipulate – as long as we don’t face any consequences. However, a wiser approach would be to delay our immediate satisfaction and concentrate on what truly matters. Sacrifice plays a role here, as it suggests that by giving up something valuable in the present, we may attain something better in the future. By controlling our impulses now, we have the potential to reap rewards later on.

 Rule 8 – tell the truth – or at least don’t lie

Choosing the path of least resistance or being honest – these options are not just two separate choices. They represent divergent roads in life. They are completely contrasting ways of living. Living a life based on deception means trying to twist reality to fit a specific outcome, limiting the existence to only what is desired and predetermined. If you hide your true self from others, you also hide it from yourself. By suppressing who you truly are, you prevent the realization of your full potential.

Rule 9 – Assume the person you are listening to knows something that you don’t

Throughout the top 100, one key theme emerges. You won’t be able to learn anything if you think you’re smarter than everyone else. However, if you embrace the idea that every person has something to teach you, you’ll find yourself growing and learning in every interaction with another human being.

Rule 10 – be precise in your speech

We change the immense complexity of things by narrowing down their purpose and using words. Why avoid being specific when specifying the problem can lead to finding a solution? Because acknowledging the problem’s existence can be challenging.

Rule 11 – do not bother the children when they are skateboarding

The oedipal moms strike a deal with themselves, their kids, and even the devil. The agreement goes like this: “No matter what, never abandon me. In exchange, I’ll go to great lengths for you.” “As you grow older without truly growing up, you’ll turn into a useless and resentful person, but you’ll never have to shoulder any accountability, and any mistakes you make will always be blamed on others. Children can either embrace or reject this, as they do have some say in the matter.

Rule 12 – pet a cat when you encounter one on the street

When you’re out for a stroll and your mind is racing with thoughts, a cat might appear. If you take notice of it, you’ll receive a brief reminder for just fifteen seconds that the beauty of existence can outweigh the inevitable pain that comes with it. Paying attention is more valuable than overthinking.

What stood out for you

Some distinct ideas compared to other self help books but nothing really revolutionary or revelatory.

Key Points

See summary

What you dislike

Over-hyped, not to knock it, but many self help books on par.

Illustrations

No

Has the book met its objective?

Yes

What would you change

I know there is a part two, maybe it contains all the things missing

What type of reader would enjoy this book

Any one looking to implement small steps to improve themselves

Would you recommend this book

With JPs recently approving genocide on twitter, I’m not inclined to suggest anyone to read his books or watch his videos.